Obituary of Kenneth Carroll Willis

Kenneth C. Willis was born on June 12, 1946 in Bruce, MS, to Lillian Blalock Willis (July 10, 1919 - April 21, 2005) and James Rudell Willis, Sr. His father lost an arm fighting in the U.S. Army on Normandy Beach on D-Day, June 6, 1944, but died in a Mississippi car accident in 1950. His mother was the Bruce High School librarian for 36 years, and taught English, Government, and American History there. She founded the library at the First Baptist Church of Bruce, where she actively volunteered 43 years, and was instrumental in establishing the first public library in Calhoun County. Kenn grew up in Bruce, together with his twin, James Rudell Willis, Jr., and his brother, Tommy H. Willis, Sr., born July 9, 1947. Graduating from high school in 1964, where he edited the yearbook, he entered the University of Mississippi at once, and earned a B.B.A. in Insurance in 1968. After military service, he returned to Ole Miss, which granted him an M.A. in Political Science in 1975, upon acceptance of a 200 page thesis on the 1973 War Powers Act. He taught courses at Ole Miss as a graduate assistant. He worked in management for the Hartford Insurance Company in Memphis right after college, and was sent to Hartford, CT for training. He accepted a better paying job with Maryland Casualty, also in Memphis, TN. On Dec. 9, 1969 he was drafted into the Army, and trained at Fort Bragg and Okinawa. He was a military policemen in Saigon during the War in Vietnam. He was released from active duty July 31, 1971, and was honorably discharged from the U.S. Army on Dec. 1, 1975. With his M.A. in hand, Kenn moved to Washington, DC in 1975. After interim private sector jobs, he began work at the Interior Department in 1977. From 1982 until his retirement Feb. 2, 2015, Kenn worked as an Information Systems Specialist, Office of Legal Counsel to the Inspector General of the General Services Administration. An internal watchdog, the Inspector General's office ferrets out waste, fraud, and abuse in the Government's contracting activities. Kenn was always proud of the work performed by the Inspector General's people. On January 14, 2015, the Office of the Inspector General gave him the Exemplary Service Award, "in Recognition of 32 years of Professionalism, Dedication and Commitment to Excellence." A retired former colleague wrote him: "You deserve these accolades more than anyone I ever worked with." During his 40 years in Washington, Kenn lived in the Dupont Circle neighborhood, where he was a familiar figure jogging, reading on the Circle itself, and patronizing the many bookstores, record stores, restaurants, and nightclubs around him. Loving music and musicals, he frequented the National Theatre, the Kennedy Center, Source, Studio, Arena Stage, Lisner, and the Lincoln. He loved the Gay Men's Chorus concerts. On May 17, 1981 he met Robert H. Wood at a popular nightclub, the Frat House (later, Omega) in Twining Court. Falling in love with each other at once, they established themselves as a couple. In 1995 Kenn and Bob became charter members of Partners, a pioneering social group of committed Gay couples. The newly formed group marched in the Pride Parade that same year. In subsequent years, Kenn always volunteered for a shift at the Partners booth at the Pride Festivals. He could be counted on to join the national marches as well, beginning with the one in 1987 that featured the first display of the AIDS Quilt on the Mall. Like others in the 1980s, Kenn lost scores of friends to AIDS. Kenn and Bob became the 22d couple to obtain a Domestic Partnership, on the first day that form of civil union became available in DC in 2002 . They were legally married on May 17, 2010 in a ceremony at the District of Columbia Superior Court -- 29 years to the day after they first met, and the first year same sex marriages became available in Washington, DC. Each summer, from the 1980s through 2013, Kenn and Bob spent eight to ten weekends at B&Bs in Rehoboth Beach, DE, especially at their favorite place, the Delaware Inn. Long days on the beach were followed by happy nights at Rehoboth's night spots. Cancer shadowed Kenn's life in the 21st century. A squamous cell cancer was surgically removed from his tongue in 2004. The surgery, a success, interfered with Kenn's speech and eating, but he returned to work and normal routines. After five years, the cancer reappeared. In 2009, to avoid removing more of the tongue, the doctors treated the malignancy with chemotherapy and radiation. The treatment eradicated the cancer, but Kenn's mouth was so sore and sensitive afterwards that he was able to eat only the softest and blandest foods. Worse, by 2014, it became apparent that the long-term effect of the radiation had caused the right lower jaw bone to die. A debridement operation bracketed by HBOT treatments seemed to help, but on July 22, 2014, his jaw fractured. A feeding tube through a nostril was installed, the first of what would be three feeding tubes (a second to the stomach, a third to the jejunum). For the rest of his life, Kenn received all food and medicines from what could be pumped into the tube by a two ounce syringe. A Sept. 9, 2014 attempt to transplant part of his shoulder blade to the jaw was scrapped when the surgeons discovered how badly infected the jawbone was. Chest muscle was transplanted instead. Kenn was unable to speak clearly after that. Worse, the cancer returned, this time to the back of the right lower jaw. Additional radiation and targeted chemotherapy were tried in the first half of 2015. They seemed to keep the cancer in check, with the hope that it could be treated as a chronic condition. On June 4, 2015, a surgeon discovered that the cancer had resumed growing, and tunneled its way from the jaw through the whole of the neck. On June 8, 2015, Kenn was told that nothing more could be done; his doctors recommended hospice care. Kenn received care at home from Community Hospice of Washington, with visits from skilled nurses and aides. Kenn listened to music and read as he slowly weakened. On July 26, 2015, he was unable to rise from bed to use his walker. A nurse made a special visit that Sunday morning, told Bob he could no longer take care of Kenn, and proposed inpatient care. On Tuesday, July 29, 2015 at 2:00 PM, Kenn and Bob went by ambulance to the Hospice inpatient facility at 3720 Upton St., NW. The doctors and nurses made him comfortable. The next morning, he was visited by the two nurse who had helped him at home, and a friend who volunteers there Wednesday mornings. He saw Kenn at 10:20 AM. At 10:30 AM, Kenn quietly and peacefully left this world, for what we trust is a better realm. He spent all but the last 20 hours of his final bout with cancer at home, and, at the last, was in a familiar place, surrounded by familiar faces. At no time was he in pain. All who knew him mourn the loss of one of the most generous, thoughtful, and joyous people, a man who perfectly balanced a commitment to excellent work with an effort to assist anyone and everyone who needed help. Kenn is survived by his husband, Robert H. Wood, both of his brothers, two brothers in law, sisters in law, nieces and nephews on both sides, and their children, and numerous cousins. A Memorial Service will be held on Sunday, Sept. 20, 2015, 12:45 PM, at Foundry United Methodist Church , 1500 16th Street, NW, Washington, DC 20036 (202-332-4010). His ashes will be placed in a niche at Arlington National Cemetery at a later time. It was his wish that, in lieu of flowers, donations be made in his memory to the community health center that provided his primary care: Whitman-Walker Health, Attn: Development, 1701 14th Street, NW, Washington, DC 20009.